you're smart enough to know telling Patti that you prefer your mum's would be an embossed fucking invitation to an Elton John gig

My favorite line out of the whole piece, though there were so many little things to choose from (and the entire story itself), that it was perhaps more difficult than normal to pick it.

And it's a no-duh that my favorite scene is the last. It can kill someone in so many different ways. *thud*